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I wasn't her First
27/03/2026
We were both two months past 19 when this occurred (our birthdays were in the same week). I just mentioned our earlier ages to help everyone understand just how long we had been together and how big of a deal this was.

My very first girlfriend and I grew up next door to each other and dated from when we were young until almost 20. Like a lot of young couples we’d argue every now and then and not speak to each other for a couple days then get back together.

She always said she wanted to wait until marriage before she had sex. I saw her as the angel she was and completely agreed to wait. I felt like it could only bring us closer when the time came. Well, as we got older and graduated high school and had more private time alone it became more and more difficult to wait for both of us. One day we were making out in my bed and we both decided we couldn’t wait anymore.

We ripped off each other’s clothes. I was on top of her awkwardly trying to figure out how to get inside her when just before I pushed in she stopped me. She said she had to tell me something and she started to get very upset.

She then confessed through sobs that almost a year earlier, during one of our brief break ups she had gone to a party with a much older guy from a horseback riding club she belonged to. He was a family friend and was a tall muscular country guy.

She said at the time she was still angry at me and he was very persuasive and they found themselves on a couch in a garage that had been converted to a game room. She said one thing rapidly led to another and she lost her virginity to him that night.

It was the only time they ever hung out. I was devastated, my mind was racing and and my heart was completely shattered. However, I couldn’t stop asking her questions and imagining the scene. I had to know every detail, was he bigger!?! did it hurt!?! where did he cum!?!

I was shaking and It was crushing me emotionally…However, at the same time I was shocked to find it was secretly turning me on picturing the two of them. Him, an older, grown man with years more experience, and her curious and nervous a shy innocent young woman surrendering the virginity she had held dear for her entire life.

After I had asked every detail she was comfortable answering we ended up calming down from the conversation and I reassured her that it didn’t change our relationship and we could pretend it never happened. After a while of cuddling we slowly started kissing and making out again. Eventually we picked back up where we had began earlier and we had sex for my first time, but not hers.

It was still afternoon so there was plenty of light in the room and I couldn’t stop looking at her imagining her making those faces she was making with me while she was underneath the other guy’s much larger hulking frame. It was killing me knowing I was experiencing things for the first time but she already had. I was touching parts of her that someone else had already beaten me to, when just an hour earlier I thought I was about to be the first.

I was insecure for a long time by the fact that due to my inexperience I only lasted a couple minutes, whereas she said he seemed to go forever that night. It ended up being my first understanding of the rush of “reclaiming”. I didn’t know what a cuck was or anything about hotpast and retroactive jealousy at that time.


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