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How I began to be a Cuckold
17/04/2020
How I began to be a Cuckold.

Funny how things start. My wife, Donna, and I have been married for 26 years. We met in college and data on and off, sometimes serious, then we would move away, date other, then we got back together in our later 20’s and married. We’ve been happy and raised two great kids. Our kids are both out of the house now. One graduated and is employed and the other finishing up her 4th year of college.
We’re both of Irish ancestry, live on Long Island, and she is now 54 and I’m 55. She has always had great shoulder length red hair, fair skin, freckles, and bright blue eyes. Never skinny, but well-rounded and fit. Her breast are on the larger side and she has always had the attention of other men wherever we go.
Our sex life as always been good. There has been an ebb and flow to it over the years. When we were first married, we were like bunnies through the two kids. Then after that we went through a few years that we were just too tired and only had sex a few times those years. That ended when we could drop the kids off at her mom’s for a long weekend and we spend the weekend at Freeport listening to the music and drinking like old times at the bars on the port town, then making love at a local hotel at night.
That weekend put us back on track. We never fell off the track and have a good intimate relationship. As we have gotten older, frequency did change, but it was always good. Depending upon the month now, we can have sex anywhere from 3 times a week to 3-4 times a month.
We are both very oral. She is open minded and we’ve played a bit with bondage. She prefers that I initiate and be the dominant one, which I am most of the time. However, I’ve always had a desire to be submissive, to service, to be used, and even be humiliated. I adore and have always been in love and lust with my wife, but these feelings have always existed and have really come to the forefront of my mind over the past few years.
A few years ago, things began. I would never bring these things up to her because I didn’t know how she would react. I would think about it when licking and worshipping her body, eating her pussy, and eating her ass. Seeing her lay there naked after sex, always makes me smile.
Like all men, I would look at porn on the Internet. Of late, I started to look at cuckold porn. I really got into the more amateur porn than the staged professional cuckold type of porn. I found “YogaHotwife” online and was absolutely addicted. I found out that the couple had lived not too far from me before moving to Florida.
I also found “JanB” online. She is a well built blonde who loves cuckolding and being with black men. I was hooked on her for a while as well. Then I found out she had a phone number and I called her a few times and paid to speak with her. I would do this in my office in the basement when my wife was out. I would have pictures of her naked, with black guys, and getting fucked on my screen while I called her and would be stroking while I spoke with her. She was nice, very intelligent, and direct. She loved being with black men. She did seem to love her husband, but all of the sex that she enjoyed was with the black men. I didn’t know what I was really looking for and didn’t ask her for any advice, but loved to hear about her and her lifestyle.
I was like a kid in a candy store, reading, learning, and jerking off to everything I was seeing online regarding the cuckold lifestyle. I saw “Rebecca Office” and jerked off to everything I could see. She was a cuckoldress for sure. She didn’t seem to want to humiliate her husband, but loved being with black men. I thought she was as sexy as anything…but not perfect in my mind.
I then found a hotwifeblog website. They would interview different hotwifes. I could then see which ones really got into the cuckolding aspect. I then found Jinxypie. She had videos where she would share her thoughts about cuckolding. She seemed to love the aspect of having sex with whoever she wanted, but also she was into humiliating her husband. This resonated with me.
I found that Jinxypie also offered phone sex or calls as part of a bigger website. I had to call her and I did. She has a great accent, is very smart, and is very direct about cuckolding. We spoke about her husband and how she doesn’t have sex with him any more and how she would not even let him jerk off in front of her. I asked and she gave me some advice on how to speak to my wife about the fantasies I have. I wasn’t sure if I could really follow through on her advice. I said to her, “I’m not really sure what I want”. She said, “I think you’re already a cuck. Let me ask you this. I see bulls all the time. I’d like to invite you to see me. Would you rather have sex with me or clean me up after the bull and I have sex?” I said without hesitating, “I’d love to clean you up, god, I’d do anything for that.” Jinxypie didn’t even laugh or smirk, she just said, “See? You’re already a cuck.”
I remember getting off the phone and thinking Jinxy is right. I didn’t know what to do about it. I had sex with my wife that night, my head filled with images of her having sex with an unknown man. We both came hard and I was happy , but confused.
The next day I was once again with my dick in my hand looking at cuckold porn on the Internet. I found Susan Reno and she was so hot as she fucked black guys, but there wasn’t really any cuckold interaction. I went to the website that I found Jinxypie on and looked for someone to give me cuckold advice. I found a mature woman and we spoke for a while. I told her about me, and Donna, and what I’m interested in. I then told her about my conversation with Jinxypie and where she said I was already a cuck. The woman I was speaking to then told me that I didn’t hesitate to say I would lick cum from Jinxy. Did I want to do that with my wife. Yes. She then said, “So you want to eat cum.” I said that I wanted to clean my wife. She then asked, “What if the cum was on the sheet, on the floor, or still on her lover’s cock and she asked you to clean it?” I did have my cock in my hand when I answered, but again, I didn’t hesitate when I said, “yes.” She said, “So, you are a fag and a cuck. You may not have done anything yet, but you are what you are. You should stop trying to be a man, just be a fag and a cuck.” She said, “Do yourself and your wife a favor. Stop having sex with her. Go down on her if you want, but don’t have sex. You’re just kidding yourself and denying reality.”
My head was spinning, but not in a bad way. She asked me if I was going to cum. I said I was close. She told me that if I’m serious, don’t hang up after I cum and to cum on my hand or on something. I agreed. I was in my office so, I came on my desk. After I came and much of the lust was gone, she told me to do what I knew she would, she told me to lick the desk clean. I did and she laughed and said, “Now you can’t say you never ate cum.” That is true.
That night when we went to bed I was horny and was touching my wife and that turned her on. We ended up naked in bed and I went down on her. I avoided her sucking on me and I ate her to an orgasm. She rode my face. She came. After she recovered, she went to grab my dick, but I told her, “Lets just make this about you.”. We then fell asleep.
We both woke up horny and naked the next morning. I was half asleep and she woke me up by going down on me. That read hair going up and down over my crotch is such a turn on. Seeing those big blue eyes look at me as she sucked on me was pushing me closer to the edge. I them rolled us over so that she was on her back and pushed myself into her very wet and very hairy pussy. I love looking down at my cock in her wet and red haired pussy. I didn’t last more than 30 seconds and came inside of her while we kissed. After I came, I felt guilty. I felt that I’m a fag and a cuck, and I fucked by wife and she didn’t come. I started kissing down her body. When I got to her nipples and were sucking and nibbling on them, she held me a bit from going down further. I said, “I want to make you cum.” She eased up and I went further down. Her pussy was wet and slopped with my cum. I started to lick her pussy and clit, then focused on licking inside her pussy, and sucking the cum out of her pussy, licking it all clean inside and out. Once I had licked up all the cum, and she was clean, I started to go down on her to make her cum. It was another wonderful orgasm for her as I ate and she rode my face. Afterwards, we lied there and she said, “That was very nice” I was excited and happy.
I spent more time jerking off on the Internet to cuckold porn. I called the woman again and told her what happened. She laughed, told me that it was a step, but to not focus on me having sex or cumming. I was addicted, wanted to become a cuckold, wanting to please my wife, but not knowing what to do.
That is when I started looking online. I went to the “m4m” section. I had a taste of cum and all of the cuckold porn had men with hard dick’s in them. I had to admit there was a certain bisexual side of me that was stirring. I am a fag after all. Some guys looking to get together, some male prostitutes, then there was one ad, a Marriage Counselor who wanted to help men become cuckolds. I knew it had to be a scam. How many guys are like me out there with their dick in their hands reading this stuff?
So, I did what any guy would do in my situation. I responded to the ad. I sent him an email that was open, but not overtly sexual and let him know my situation and what has been driving me. He responded, it was very professional and he touch me he was a Psychologist and a Professional Therapist and Marriage Counselor. After one more volley of emails, he suggested we speak on the phone and he gave me his name and phone number. I googled it and sure enough, he was who he said he was and lived about 30 minutes from us in Farmingville.
I called him when he suggested I did and he was available to speak with me. He told me I could call him Dr Mark. We spoke more about me, my drivers, and about what my wife liked. We ended the called with two next steps. I was to use a toy that my wife had on my wife while we had sex and make references to that being another person, he gave me some suggestions and instructions and we set up an in office meeting. He was not charging me since this was something he was interested in helping people like me out with.
That night as we went to bed, I began to kiss and caress my wife. She pushed me away and said she was tired. I was revved up and disappointed, but I understood. After Donna fell asleep, I snuck out of bed and went into my office and spent 3 hours stroking my dick and watching cuckold porn, interracial porn, and reading cuckold stories.
The next night, Donna was more receptive. I think because she knew I wanted her. We kissed and fondled each other. I kissed my way down and soon had my face in between her thighs and buried in her red bush. When she was very wet I quickly went to her night draw and took out her 8” dildo. She gasped a little, but let me. As she saw what I was doing, she just looked on with kind of a judges expression that said, “I’ll allow it, lets see where this goes”.
As I went down on her again and she became wetter, I began to follow Dr. Mark’s directions. I began to lick her clit and slowly have the dildo enter her. Donna was very wet and it was easy to push the dildo in. I build a rhythm and I could tell it was having an effect. After a bit, I took the dildo out and put it in my mouth, sucking her juices off of the dildo as she watched. Then I put it back into her and pushed it in and out while sucking on her clit. After a bit, I pulled the dildo out and put it in my mouth again and sucked it clean. Donna watched as I did this. I repeated this for a while, then she climaxed while I was sucking her clit and fucking her with the dildo. After she came, she was still in the after climax moment and I took the dildo out again and sucked it clean. As she stared at me, I took the dildo out and told her to roll over.
She knew what that meant and did so without question. I kissed her wonderful white ass cheeks. I then licked up and down the crack of her ass from the beginning of the crack passed her asshole, just running over it with my tongue, then to her pussy, plunging my tongue into her pussy. I did this slowly for a bit until she was wet and flowing again. Then I moved my mouth to her asshole and began to suck and kiss it, then stuck my tongue all the way in. I began to fuck and suck her asshole with my tongue until she raised her ass a bit, then with my face in her ass, my tongue up her butt, I pushed the dildo into her pussy again and began to fuck her. I did this for a while, then pulled the dildo out and sucked it clean, then repeated. About the third cycle of this, Donna asked, “are you licking it clean?” I didn’t answer, but she replied, “You love the way I taste”. She climaxed again not too long after.
As she relaxed after climaxed, I kissed my way slowly back up her body. When we were face to face. She smiled and said, “Your face is a mess, naught boy” and she kissed me. She began to stroke my hard dick. Then she guided me into her. She was wet and warm, and wonderful. I came quickly and deep inside of her. I was too turned on and she was too hot. Donna didn’t have a chance for another climax with me inside of her. I then did ask Dr. Mark instructed, I kissed my way back down her body and began to lick up her juices from her thighs and plunged my tongue into her and cleaned up all of my cum. Donna laid there. I had done this before and Dr. Mark told me that I should make a point to do this as a practice. Donna didn’t comment while I cleaned up and sucked up everything, then I began to eat her to make her cum. She rode my face until she had her third climax. When she was done, I slowly and gently licked her clean, her pussy, and her thighs. Then I moved back up to her and faced her. She pushed my face away and said, “you’re a mess naughty boy. That was hot.” I was turned on and thought “mission accomplished.”
Donna and I didn’t’ talk about the sex activity. We did have one identical session before I was scheduled to meet Dr. Mark. The thoughts that went through my head were of me sucking on the rubber cock while Donna watched, me licking my cum from Donna, and embarrassingly, me cumming inside of Donna in under a minute.
I was nervous when it was time to visit Dr. Mark. It was a little bit of an outer body experience and I went with it. I was about to speak with another man about convincing my wife to have sex with other men. More than that I wanted my wife to humiliate me in the process. I’m not sure what all of that mean, but I was doing it and about to speak with another man about it. I was a bit relieved when I pulled up to his Farmingville house. It was a fairly large sized house. Farmingville is an inexpensive area, but now all lower income, it allowed for a bit more property and bigger houses on Long island. He had one side of his house set up as an office. He had his “shingle” on a post and was in face a Psychiatrist and certified councilor. That slowed down my heart rate as I approached the door and went inside his office. I was greeted by his receptionist behind a desk. I gave my name to her. She was a middle aged woman, about my age. She had my appointment and told me to sit on the couch in the waiting room and he would be with me in a few minutes.
I waited a bit nervously and thumbed through magazines on the coffee table in the room. I watched the news. He had it on Fox News. Then after about 15 minutes, Dr. Mark came out of the office with a couple. The couple was in their 40’s. I presumed they were there for marriage counseling.
Dr. Mark shook my hand, introduced himself, and led me into his office. His office was spacious, had a couch, nice sized desk, table and a few comfortable chairs. I noticed his degrees the wall and he had attended Cornell Medical School. I exhaled slowly, thinking, Ok, he is the real deal.
Dr. Mark was in his mid 30’s. He had dark brown hair and obviously was no stranger to the gym. He had a confident way about him and directed me to a chair and he sat in an identical chair about 4 feet from me. He had a folder that he opened, and red from it. “You’re 51 years old, own an IT consulting business, have been married for over 20 year, have two children. Your wife is Donna, she if 50, and you’ve known her since college. You have a desire to see her with other men and you have a strong desire to become a cuckold. Humiliation and degradation are part of your fantasies and desires. I have this right?” I confirmed he did.
He asked me if I followed his instructions and I told him in detail. He asked about me sucking on the dildo. Did I enjoy it? I thought it was hot and loved licking her juices from it. Did Donna enjoy it? She seemed to and commented on me tasting her. He said, “Good. Have you ever done that with a man?” It flustered me and I stuttered and said, “No” . He told me to relax, he asked because I had referred to myself as a fag previously repeating what the phone sex woman told me.
Dr. Mark asked me if we experimented or did anything kinky. I told him that we played with bondage. Donna liked being tied up. She also liked being gagged. (I became a bit aroused thinking of times that I tied her with old silk ties to the bed. Her blue eyes and fair skin face framed by her red hair was lust filled while she was bound. Her white well-proportioned body was at my mercy.) Dr. Mark asked, “ Anything else, anything kinkier or more taboo? She seemed to accept the dildo play and you sucking on it without a problem.” I said, “A few times when we were drunk, we played with Golden Showers.” He told me to “go on…” I hesitated, then said, “when we were drinking and it was summer I went to pee in the bushes in our backyard when nobody was around. She held my dick, I moved so that it would spray on her. I then directed it at her body, her tits, her stomach, and her legs, making her clothes wet with my pee.” Dr. Martin prompted, “Is there more?”. I sniffed a bit then said, ‘Yes, she wanted to return the favor so I laid down and she took off her shorts and panties and peed on me. She wanted to tease me so she sprayed my face, but I opened my mouth and drank, and she squatted over my mouth and peed into it. We repeated this on a few other drunken summer nights, each time ending with her peeing and me drinking.”
We spoke more about my desires. He asked intimate questions about what my wife liked, sexually, and not sexually. He asked to see pictures of her. I showed him pictures of her on my phone. He took my phone and emailed the pictures to me. He also took her cell phone number and email from my phone. He handed my phone back to me.
He said, “We will meet again next week. Over the next week, I want you to do a few things. Keep the same sexual activities up. If you do enter her, try to do so only when you are about to climax. Ideally, and you should strive for this, try to climax just as you enter her or before you do. Also, I want you to do a few other things. Whenever you orgasm, you should consume it. Get in the habit of that. It will set your mental thinking correctly. Continue to view cuckold and interracial pornography. Do not clear your browsing history and do not close your browser. You should allow your wife the opportunity to see what you are looking at, if she is curious. Also, let her catch you masturbating. It can be in your office or anywhere, but she should see you clearly. Ideally it would be while you are looking at this pornography. Can you do this?” I replied that I would “try”. Dr. Mark said, “if you are serious about this, you will do it. I’m not charging you and I’m investing my time. How did you get the courage to speak with me and come here?” I told him that I was partly driven and was partly on autopilot as this was a bit of an outer body experience. Dr. Mark said, “That is good. Go with that. Just jump in, don’t think. You’ll see how things work out. Experience it. You will continue to grow in your experience.”
Donna has demonstrated that she is open to things. This is a good sign for you.
With that he got up. He said, “Feel free to email me between now and our next appointment if you have questions, need advice, or want to share anything.” As he walked me into the reception area, he said, “Lisa, please schedule Mike for the same time next week. It is pro bono”.
I stumbled out the door and to my car. As I drove away, my head was spinning.


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