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just found out
26/01/2010
I just found out that my wife of five years is having an affair with a man down the block from us. Actually it was Thursday, and today is Tuesday. I didn't want to jump to conclusions so I waited a few days to watch her behavior and get clues.

Last Thursday: my wife (pretty, and petite @ 5'4", and in shape) left for an early morning run. Not unusual behavior for her, she runs 10K races and a yearly half marathon. Right after she left, out the back door to run down the alley, I went to the alley to make sure all of the re-cycling and garbage was put out for pick-up later in the morning. She must not have seen me. Just as I got out to the alley I looked up and saw she hadn't got into a run yet but was walking, and just opening, then closing behind her, a backyard gate toward the end of the block.

What The Fuck, I think, and follow to that yard to see what she is investigating, maybe something is wrong over there. When I get to that yard, she is not there. There are no lights on in the house, so I don't think to knock on the door. I go back to the house...I'm leaving for work in 20 minutes.

At work, an hour later, I call to say good morning and to wonder about what happened, and I already have some worry going on. She doesn't answer her cell phone. She'd be back by now; maybe she's in the shower; maybe she had a meeting (suddenly a vague and worrisome term); maybe something happened to her; maybe she is with that neighbor.

That neighbor: a friendly professorial, artist type in his mid-forties, somehow semi-retired and teaching at a local college. Good looking and friendly guy with whom I talk at neighborhood functions and in the line at the local espresso.

I finally talk to my wife at around 10:30, saying "good morning. I didn't see you off today, how was your run?"

"Awesome," she says, "90 minutes. 45 out, and 45 back. A very good clip. How are you?"

"I'm good, what can I say I'm at work." She laughs at this. And this banter, this is all so normal."

And I say, "Usual route?"

She: "Down to the park and around and then up the boulevard to 35th and back."

"Anything else?" I ask, and she says "No, what you up to?"
"Nothing much."
"Well, hey, I'll check you later."

So, that was Thursday. Over the weekend she went for "a swim" and "ran errands" each time when I wasn't at the house and couldn't get to the alley to see if she went there. "OK, have a good one," I say by phone, knowing the irony of what I say.

I considered all the permutations and kept coming back to her and him together, and it angered and grieved me; I have sobbed in private at the prospect; and once, imagining them together, it aroused me. With all this in mind we had sex both Friday and Saturday nights and it was great as it always is -- She gets off and it's amazing. But I avoid going down on her both times...well, because. (but when I fingered her before fucking I examined the consistency and feel of the wetness that was there. and I've examined her undies...nothing definitive)

Monday, she took a run in the morning, out and back in 40 minutes before I left for work.

This morning, Tuesday, out for the run into the dark, and yes, she enters his yard again. I run down the alley and peek 'round the tree and see my wife in his arms in his kitchen...a kiss on the cheek and then the light goes out as they leave for another room.

I nearly collapse on the ground at the reality of my fears. Leaning on the tree, I watch and wait for half an hour. No lights, no indication.

What to do....Our life together is the envy of our family and friends. Our sex is crazy after all these years. If I confront, if I inquire, it can ruin what we have. Why ruin what we have? If I had not seen her on that one day, and then yesterday, I would be none the wiser and still as happy. I found this unlikely strange site cruising the web at work today.

This morning, I fucked her brains out and it was amazing for each of us. She said "I love you so much!" as she came, and then when I was in the shower she went off for her morning run. "Run?"

What to do....


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